Things To Stop Saying To Twin Parents



pc: Keisha Montfleury on Unsplash

“Double trouble!”

I had a singleton first, and not once did anyone curiously lean over her stroller, peer down my sleeping child, and pronounce such calamity. Sure, there are times when they will challenge the bounds of your motherly limits, but seriously, no mom wants to hear this about her twins in the middle of her favorite grocery store.

Any questions or outbursts relating to conception are simply distasteful.

I was about 7 months pregnant with our twins when we began shopping for a used minivan. My husband was making conversation with the salesman, and when he mentioned that I was pregnant with twins, the man exclaimed, “Right on! Double-shooter!” smiling impressively at my husband.

“Hey Siri, can boy/girl twins be identical?…The people want to know!”

No, nope, never, nunca. Wherever you are, if you happen to see a parent with boy/girl twins…they are never identical.

“Wow! You’ve got your hands full!”

This is probably one of the phrases I hear the most. I think people say it because they just don’t know what else to say, and this is the first thing that comes to mind—especially if you have other children besides the twins, they quickly do the math, and conclude that you are outnumbered.

“Do they run in your family?”

Okay… I see you! Would it really matter? Would it really change the trajectory of your life if you had that information?

“I couldn’t do it! I’m going crazy with one!”

A man told me this while waiting in the pediatrician’s office one afternoon. Um, actually sir you could. Twin dads do it every day. My husband has modified our double stroller several times with common household items on an afternoon trip to the mall play area. And with all four children in tow, he has challenged the boundaries of capacity for an ordinary double stroller far beyond the two children it was designed to transport.

dad to twins

As a twin parent, you become a spectacle, subject to the bewilderment of random passersby, but we wouldn’t change it for anything!