The Potty Training Diaries:: Thoughts and Prayers from the Trenches

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Potty Training Day 1 4:57pm

“I don’t like this. I’m putting dis away. I’m closed! I’m not going potty! It’s bad.”

We are officially potty training our last kiddo, and I hate it. It’s the only “last kid last milestone” that I would gladly skip if I could! To say that I don’t like potty training would be the understatement of the year. It’s honestly my least favorite part of having young children. Bring me your teething babies any day of the week! 

Day 2 9:15am

“I peed on Mickey…womp womp womp!”

potty training

With my first son, I was all read up and ready to conquer potty training the day he turned two. He had other plans. He wasn’t prepared, and we both just ended up frustrated, angry, and wet very, very wet. I threw in the towel after a couple of days and decided to wait until he was ready.

The first trip out of the house with a new potty trainee is always an adventure. One of my sons’ (who I won’t name here for his own sake) had his first real underwear wearing outing to the zoo. We made it as far as the front gates. He had to go to the bathroom, so we went into one of the family bathrooms. I sat him on the toilet, and the automatic flush went off. He freaked out! So I pulled him off, stood him on the bathroom counter, and proceeded to use a piece of toilet paper to cover the flush sensor. And then he started peeing. That poor bathroom floor never stood a chance! I did the best I could to clean us all (including the floor) up, and then we went home.

Day 1 million-ish

“Where are you gonna go when you have to go pee-pee?” “Downstairs to watch TV.”

My kids have all potty trained “late” as far as the social norms seem to dictate. I continually remind myself that no one is going to ask them when they were potty trained when they go to college or have a first date. I have no idea when my husband was potty trained, and our relationship has done just fine.

I have no tips. I have no advice. If you are potty training, you have my thoughts and prayers. 

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